Tuesday

[Verse 1] There's something you should probably know before we go too far My neighbor found a mushroom growing inside of my car She called me up on tour, sounding emotionally scarred Although it may have scared her more that I wasn't really alarmed The dandruff in a shaken globe is fit to gild a manger The pizza face is pepperoni, carbuncle, and caper I'm bunions and contusions, bumps, lumps and bruises Discoloring, and other things I can't reach with a loofah Not a butcher, not a baker Pick a booger with a basic evolutionary failure I do not open mail, I do not answer phones The fridge is pretty much a home for mayonnaise alone Watch a pocketknife surgeon cut a cyst out in the kitchen It's the cousin to acutely removing his own stitches in a pinch Kool-Aid ooze out his toothache Mushroom growing in the car; it's just another Tuesday [Chorus] (Forever now, forever it's a Tuesday) Tuesday (Forever now, forever now) Tuesday And if you waiting for a spell Where it falls into an order you can help? Then well, yeah No [Verse 2] On one hand, it's pretty gross On the other, it's sort of like a pretty desert rose How against all odds, whether wet, dry, night or day Garden, pigsty or cave, life science finds a way Boxed in, vegged out, fox in the henhouse Gray-stained teeth, say "cheese" through a trench-mouth "Cheese!" Chase dreams with the hellbound Posture suitable for a job in a bell tower One plate, one fork, itty-bitty lamp I would offer you a drink, but I literally can't It feels like you're camping when you're sitting on the can Where the crib has always simulated living in a van A little light cleaning, keep the spiders off his eating Maybe one day, he'll go deeper Really exorcise the demon at the root I'm in the sofa cushions over loose change Black mold bathtub; homie, it's a Tuesday [Chorus] (Forever now, forever it's a Tuesday) Tuesday (Forever now, forever now) Tuesday And if you waiting for a spell Where it falls into an order you can help? Then well, yeah No [Verse 3] I can't even keep a cactus alive when I'm present When I'm gone, it's a groundbreaking botanical epic From desolate to Little Shop of Horrors in a second It's weird knowing life thrives more when you exit The Trouble Man, cuddle with a duffel bag of loose cash Chews glass, scatterbrained, aspartame moo-stache Mwah! Head lice, dressed like a douchebag Unsaid prayers, undead raccoon hat Voice of the boiled-over Thick skull; still throw his toys out his stroller Piss black roof tar, bleed flat Cherry Coke Very much another wack-job with a megaphone Very much another fat slob playing chess alone Lesser-known fetish porn, leftover Lexapro, et cetera Everything's coming up goose eggs Sunday, Monday, Happy Days, Tuesday is Tuesday [Outro] (Forever now, forever it's a Tuesday) Tuesday (Forever now, forever now) Tuesday (Forever now, forever it's a Tuesday) (Forever now, forever now)