Main Theme

[Verse 1: Alex] What you want you? A house or a car? Forty acres and a mule, a piano, a guitar? Anything', see, my name is Uncle Sam, I'm your dog Motherfucker, you can live at the mall I know your kind (that's why I'm kind) Don't have receipts (oh, man, that's fine) Pay me later, wear those gators Cliché? Then say, "Fuck your haters" I can see the baller in you I can see the dollar in you Little white lies, but it's no white-collar in you But it's whatever though because I'm still following' you Because you make me live forever, baby, count it all together, baby Then hit the register and make me feel better, baby Your horoscope is a Gemini, two sides So you better cop everything two times Two coupes, two chains, two C-notes Too much ain't enough, both we know Christmas, tell 'em what's on your wishlist Get it all, you deserve it, Alex And when you hit the White House, do you But remember, you ain't pass economics in school And everything you buy, taxes will deny I'll Wesley Snipe your ass before thirty-five Wow That’s deep Goddamn [Verse 2: Conor] You know I don’t really know what I’m gonna say right here But I wanted it to be cool And I really wanted to be included in this album So Kick back Relax And enjoy the tunes [Verse 3: Tor] Ay, yo, I’m gonna tell y’all a little story Okay, this was back in mother fucking Junior year of high school I had a college admissions advisor So this guy would like Advise me on the application process And help me pick schools based on You know, my interests and shit Ok, so this guy, upon hearing my college prospects Cause- I- I wanted to go to NYU and USC and Chapman You know, a perspective film student You know, with these schools being sought after institutions Upon seeing my SAT scores and other determining factors He left me with this quote Alright, I’m gonna spit this for you “Shoot for the stars But the moon’s pretty good too.” [Verse 4: Charlie] Fuck the fame, keep cheatin' on me What I do, I took her back, fool me twice that's my bad I can't even blame her for that 'Nough to make me wanna murder, mama please just get my bail I know nobody to blame Kurt Cobain, I did it to myself, uh And we all just Entertainers And we're stupid And contagious [Verse 5: Casey] Insert Casey’s verse [Break: Andrew, Alex] Alex…? Can you please write my paper Hahahaha Please! [Verse 6: Matt] Oh Oh Oh Oh I got no flow like I’m constipated Well, I am also actually constipated I eat ass like a donkey muncher Penis crusher Jesus must’ve loved her Cause those titties be holy Guacamole, I’m a better wrapper than your Dad the night before Christmas But what he doesn’t know is that he’s on my wish list A squared b squared equals mother fucking c squared Pythagorean theorem got your bitch on my d squared Got my mouth on her nipple like a breast pump Got her hands on my nuts like she checking for a lump Ay Ok, six foot two with that compact Call me short stack Got no racks Blow backs Like a fucking chiropractor Velociraptor I have dug myself a hole by using velociraptor JUST KIDDING Velociraptor Yeah I tapped her Smack the pastor Pass the asher I’m the greatest rapper I love math cause I’m the most common factor Lacking good connections Like I need an adapter Got my eyes on the bands like I’m a music agent From the south like I’m a raging cajun You best be playing In the south Is where I’m not staying, I’m actually in Illinois right now Damn I live in Illinois now That’s crazy The United States education system has fundamentally failed an entire generation I be clapping bros’ cheeks, it’s an upgrade from mastrubation AGHH [Break: Alex] Where did they move to? Fucker’s Isle Brazil! Alright? [Verse 7: Max Voltz] なんであいつらはピンク？ 動物園で思った ピンク 食べ物で そうなんだ 実は私はたらこが大好き プラス エビ カニ 食べよう ピンク色になるの だからみんな違う色 人間って勘違いしてるよね [Verse 8: Gylani] *animal crossing noises* [Verse 9: Catalina] *animal noises* [Break: Gylani] [?] [Break: Ben, Gylani, Alex] You’re running a literal Haha Crime sex ring I am not! With beastiality You’re the main customer You’re the one walking in there- (When-) When have I fucked a duck? I don’t know, I don’t know what you do in your free time Well then how do you- Well then how am I a customer if you don’t if I fuck ducks or not? I work- (Haha) I work in housing I can sit there, look at the cameras, watch you- And watch me not fuck ducks? (putting your penis inside a duck) Fair enough You, will fuck, a duck This is how- So those people definitely heard that Haha Oh the world will hear this The world will hear this! [Verse 10: Ben, Alex] Thank you for the love (AH) Thank you for the joy(AH) But I don’t ever Fall in love again (THAT’S RIGHT) Thank you for the time (AGH) Thank you for your mind (AGH) But I don't ever Fall in love again (LET’S GO) [Verse 11: Catalina] Once upon a time There was a player The player was you Sometimes it thought itself human On the thin crust of a spinning globe of molten rock The ball of molten rock circled a ball of blazing gas That was three hundred and thirty thousand times more massive than it They were so far apart that light took eight minutes to cross the gap The light was information from a star And it could burn your skin from a hundred and fifty million kilometers away Sometimes the player dreamed it was a miner On the surface of a world that was flat, and infinite The sun was a square of white The days were short; there was much to do; And death was a temporary inconvenience Sometimes the player dreamed it was lost in a story Sometimes the player dreamed it was other things, in other places Sometimes these dreams were disturbing Sometimes very beautiful indeed Sometimes the player woke from one dream into another Then woke from that into a third And sometimes the player believed the universe had spoken to it Through the light that fell from the crisp night sky of winter Where a fleck of light in the corner of the player's eye Might be a star a million times as massive as the sun Boiling its planets to plasma in order to be visible for a moment to the player Walking home at the far side of the universe Suddenly smelling food, almost at the familiar door, about to dream again And sometimes the player believed the universe had spoken to it Through the zeros and ones Through the electricity of the world Through the scrolling words on a screen at the end of a dream And the universe said I love you And the universe said you have played the game well And the universe said everything you need is within you And the universe said you are stronger than you know And the universe said you are the daylight And the universe said you are the night And the universe said the darkness you fight is within you And the universe said the light you seek is within you And the universe said you are not alone And the universe said you are not separate from every other thing And the universe said you are the universe tasting itself Talking to itself, reading its own code And the universe said I love you because you are love And the game was over and the player woke up from the dream And the player began a new dream And the player dreamed again, dreamed better And the player was the universe And the player was love You are the player Wake up [Verse 12: Meredith] Um, fun fact I wasn’t taught uh Phonics as a kid And so now I pronounce Bouquet as bouquet And façade as façade Hahaha In my head, every time I read them Without fail There you go Don’t hold that over my head please Hahaha [Verse 13: Will] My Jeans were all baggy They went past my heels I’m searching for a savior One who knows how it feels I searched the world over I went out my way Then one day I found her Now I want her to stay Mom pegged my jeans (My jeans) She made the legs shorter Mom pegged my jeans (My jeans) Now I don’t have to order A new pair to wear around the scene Mom pegged my jeans (My jeans) Mom pegged my jeans (My jeans) [Verse 14: Max Voltz] Yeah, naked truth lies, only if you realize Appearing in nobody's eyes, till they sterilize Stop the guerrilla, warfare to keep fair Bro, change your rage to a smarter greater cause You know the stake is high stardom is near Those who sympathized you died, killer pass you by Do not waste your time In hating flirting guys Use your might to AIs to do justice to them all [Break: Jack] No, No, NO NO NO NOOOO UUAAAGHHHHHHHH THIS WAS NOT HOW IT WAS SUPPOSED TO GO IIIIIIIIII HAD IT ALL PLANNED OUT [Verse 15: Payton] What’s up losers It’s Payton Uh I am just gonna read a little poem I wrote I keep telling myself I’ll see you again one day Maybe in passing on the sidewalk of some unnamed town Or in a bar hidden deep in the city on a Tuesday night Because none of us can sleep Or even just a glimpse of you sitting next to me at a stoplight I keep telling myself that the universe will cause our paths to cross again It’s the only thing I can do Because I can’t stand the thought of never seeing you again You see, we never know that the beginning is the beginning Until we’re halfway through the story And we don’t know the end is the end until we start reading the next one But the middle of it all was a chaotic and beautiful and most of the time insane mess; One that not even the best housekeepers in my brain could clean In the meantime, you’ll keep living your life And I’ll keep living mine But I’ll see you tomorrow And tomorrow and tomorrow and tomorrow And every tomorrow that follows until tomorrow doesn’t exist anymore I came into this lounge group Sometime at the end of winter quarter Beginning of spring And, I didn’t really know any of you Very well But God am I so glad I did And I got to know all of you individually And as a group And I don’t know what I would’ve done this quarter without you guys So Thanks for being The craziest people That I’ve met this year And Thanks for being Home U Hall has been our home for the past year And you guys have been part of that home I’m going to cherish every single memory that we made here I want to remember this Even though it didn’t last very long Years down the road I want to remember this Thank you guys For everything This is Payton Signing off [Verse 16: Alex] Bad bitch, pardon me, I say, "What's up?" (Yuh) Educated, so I put her in the cut (What) I need a girlfriend I need a girlfriend (Yuh) Two hoes and I think I did too much I got two phones and I don't know who to trust (Yuh) I need a girlfriend (Yuh) I need a girlfriend (Yuh) AGH Keem Baby Keem Fin