If I Had a Million Dollars

[Verse 1] If I had a million dollars (If I had a million dollars) Well, I’d buy you a house (I would buy you a house) And if I had a million dollars (If I had a million dollars) I’d buy you furniture for your house (Maybe a nice chesterfield or an ottoman) And if I had a million dollars (If I had a million dollars) Well, I’d buy you a K-Car (A nice reliant automobile) And if I had a million dollars, I’d buy your love [Chorus 1] If I had a million dollars (I’d build a tree-fort in our yard) If I had a million dollars (You could help, it wouldn’t be that hard) If I had a million dollars (Maybe we could put a little tiny fridge In there somewhere) [Post-Chorus 1] You know, we could just go up there and hang out (Like open the fridge and stuff And there’d all be foods laid out for us Like little pre-wrapped sausages and things) (They have pre-wrapped sausages but they don’t have pre-wrapped bacon) Well, can you blame them? (Yeah!) [Verse 2] If I had a million dollars (If I had a million dollars) Well, I’d buy you a fur a coat (But not a real fur coat, that’s cruel) And if I had a million dollars (If I had a million dollars) Well, I’d buy you an exotic pet (Yep, like a llama or an emu) And if I had a million dollars (If I had a million dollars) Well, I’d buy you John Merrick’s remains (Ooh all them crazy elephant bones) And if I had a million dollars I’d buy your love [Chorus 2] If I had a million dollars (We wouldn’t have to walk to the store) If I had a million dollars (We’d take a Limousine ’cause it costs more) If I had a million dollars (We wouldn’t have to eat Kraft dinner) [Post-Chorus 2] But we would eat Kraft dinner (Of course we would, we’d just eat more) And buy really expensive ketchups with it (That’s right, all the fanciest - Dijon ketchups) [Verse 3] If I had a million dollars (If I had a million dollars) Well, I’d buy you a green dress (But not a real green dress, that’s cruel) And if I had a million dollars (If I had a million dollars) Well, I’d buy you some art (A Picasso or a Garfunkel) If I had a million dollars (If I had a million dollars) Well, I’d buy you a monkey (Haven’t you always wanted a monkey?) If I had a million dollars, I’d buy your love [Outro] If I had a million dollars (If I had a million dollars) If I had a million dollars (If I had a million dollars) If I had a million dollars I'd be rich