Sirius Dreams

Thank you. Thank you, thank you, thank you... I don't know what to say other than that. This whole project, whether you look at it as a mixtape or an album—to me—it's the beginning of my life's work. Literally. Some of the first few rhymes and personal musical compositions I ever wrote is on this very project. Stuff on here dates back to random scribbles on random class journal pages and napkins from my life in just 8th grade. - "Kool-Aid and Frozen Pizza" and "What's the 411/The Ride" were my first two raps of 2012. - "I Have to Go", "Why You Forcing Me" and "I'm Alive Again" were among my first few original music and lyric compositions of that same year. And in just that year alone, I frequently was 'creating'. Everyday before I had a laptop or a phone I basically had notebooks and pads on pads of new material and out of that—you actually have finally gotten the chance to hear a great amount of it. I've been waiting a long time for that. For this. Honest. And that applies to every song on here. From the simple things I began drafting my freshman year at LaGuardia ("So Mellow", "I. A Whole New World"), to the more complex ideas branching from my complicated and isolated sophomore year ("Two Truths and a Lie", "Oncheezied"), this project for me is truly Magnificent, not just in content, but as an accomplishment, in all aspects of the word. ...but this is surreal... For some people it might be something of vanity that makes them continue in this field, or it bringing in the money that keeps them afloat, or for others it may just be the simplicity that it sometimes brings to your life. Specifically for me, I think it's the beauty of something I created actually coming to life. Except this time, it's not leading to the Pygmalion fault, it's leading to happiness. Sitting here listening to this stuff and playing it back, it's actually starting to sound the way I imagined it not so many years ago. That's inconceivable magic to me. Lovely magic. The type of magic that makes my grandparents smile at finally hearing their only son singing and loving music the way he used to—and it's that same smile that brightens their lives as they see their grandson doing what he's always wanted. The type of magic that makes me not feel alone but connected to more positive and beautiful things in life, more beautiful people. The type of magic that makes it clear anything is possible, even if it isn't necessarily obvious or evident. But, it's bittersweet just the same because this isn't it. It's not the end. I'd like to be able to sit on this for a while and just listen with you. It's changed me, just in the way I hope it changes you. But I can't, I have to keep working. There's so much more I have to finish now that I don't think—but I know is possible. So I'd like to start by saying this is not your average mixtape. This is my mixtape. This is something different. Nothing on here is really going to sound like it's being DJ'd and that's not the point if it were. It's the fact that despite what my father, Kedar and Mike have all told me throughout this phase of my life and how I ever felt about it—they're starting to sound right. This isn't a mixtape. ...it's more of an album... A conceptual one on the objects and objectives of my desires, the inner workings of my puerile mind—that ironically refuses to be subject to mediocracy. And to those reading this, to those who I've let in—especially those who I've truly collaborated with on and during the time of recording this tape—I preach the same exact thing to you. To even those who don't enjoy this work of mine or aren't reading this, are reading this but don't feel it or perhaps may never read it, I still say the same. For the most part, I don't necessarily mind if you do not enjoy this. But I know I did and for now, I'll try my best to make that suffice and convince you I'm worthy of your hearts next time around. Now for the thank you's... Jharrel Jerome you're first up. From the bottom of my heart, thank you so very much for the opportunity that you gave me in the first place. "Big Spender", "Rap Battle (Skit 1)", but then again all of F.M.L opened doors for me. Not only did you show me that literally someone my age could figure out a way to get a real studio and scrummage together some sort of money to get through an entire year of recording a project—but you gave me the template of what I believe helped me format this tape. And it was a template I had to both look up to and defeat at the same time. You making that both difficult and enjoyable for me has made me respect you more than just as an artist or as one of the many profusely heartwarming and talented creatures that walk this Earth, but as a man, and I will always look to you as that and nothing less. You're going to be an undoubtedly favorited addition to this label. All the best wishes to you and your family, as well as to your great success at Ithaca. To the members of True Artists. I'll hit you all one by one in a moment, but I'd like to start by saying you were the first part of the Magnificent family and my LaGuardia family. And I will never forget any of you for that. We've kept each other intact in more ways than I bet any of us realize. We're changing the game with the stuff we do—and we know that. It's really too late to try and stray from it even if you wanted to. If anything happened to any of ya'll, I'd lose it and I'm glad we've all stayed healthy and proud regardless of any of the traumas or stress in our lives. That's never negatively affected our art—but in some ways it's empowered it. Thus, why we're "true artists". I know we hated the name starting out, but I'm glad it's grown on us. I'll always have your backs when something ever goes askew and you can count on me to be the one dumping the gatorade on each of you when we reach the end of the road. Let's start with you Vito—mister Travis Raeburn. I've known you since middle school (well, more like known of you then) and officially gotten to know you and consider you a close friend of mine during our years at LaGuardia. I trust you with all my heart man. We had a conversation once about our futures. Inconsistencies. Me about Steph, you about the things you haven't experienced. I don't exactly remember in what context, but I remember saying "if we make it." You looked at me like I was crazy and stopped us from walking to where we had to go. You looked at me and set me straight. You told me "when we make it." Forever since that moment, I've held that thought close. Especially since it was similar to a parallel my father often made. God said "let there be light", and there simply was. Nothing less. By continuing to think that way, we will be there in seconds. Best believe. Marquise Naipaul. It's funny how your name shortened is like the word "mark", and you're an illustrator. We've had some great times man. You're one of the most level-headed, humbled young men I've gotten to know. You do what you do with ease. And your strategy out of everyone in our crew has easily allowed us to never feel restrained by an issue. To Marq, usually we can just so quickly bypass it, because your wisdom is plainly, anything is possible. If one thing doesn't work with you, you just go with it. Maybe it wasn't meant to happen, if it is, it'll happen eventually. Well, it's happening now. I think it really is. And I'm glad we got front row seats. Nathaniel Singh, I've been praying for you man. As upset as I am that you had to leave LaG and that you were so sick all those months, I'm glad you're finally getting back on your feet. If you listened to the tape, you probably noticed there's an unfinished version of "Make Believe", and that's because we still gotta get together and do it. We need you Tanny. Our squad can't survive without you. You're such a humorous, friendly guy man. I'm so sorry for the times you were going through during your absence. I know the world gets heavy on us sometimes and we'd just prefer to drop the ball, but honestly man I love you to death. You gotta keep your head up and keep killing them with these hits. When we do finish "Make Believe"—well, let's just say we won't be able to live normal lives anymore. We're not normal people Nate. None of us are. Nobody on this tape is normal and that's the genius of it. We're all a little bit insane man and that's the thing that makes me and you click. Hell, half the time we're talking to each other people feel like we're speaking a different language. And it's 'cuz we are. Sincere gratitude to your parents, your brothers and much love to you and your boy Ceddy. (P.S. I heard about the possible Def Jam signing man. God's pulling up on the other side huh? How green is it over there? Peace man. Stay up.) Houston Arriaga, I gave you that "Star" name and it fits well. I got to know you pretty well as the release of this whole thing approached. I'm sorry we didn't get together sooner and that we still haven't finished "Rescue", but best believe when we do, we're gonna sit back and chill. Your presence is incredible. You're a very good spirit to keep around when times get tough. I appreciate that. You're strength precedes you man and I look up to you for that. Stay up brother. Kar'mel A. W. Smalls, I hope you like what I did with "Two Truths and a Lie". I kind of had to pull a full throttle on it since we weren't able to meet up and work on it the way I wanted and planned to. But I hope I still did it justice in your opinion. You've showed me so much of your work man and truthfully I can't wait to see you blossom. Not just in music but with your swift dance and harmonious vocal talents. That no one has yet to hear. You, as well as Jharrel, are two people I'm definitely planning on working with day after day after day. Your energies are beyond living—they're angelic. When we meet again we're both gonna be in the booth together. In the meantime, let's keep on growing. Alprentice Davis. We did it. We're finally moving forward. I used to talk about this all the time and we're finally in the studio doing everything I said we would. You got to be on a mixtape finally, you have a single of your own and aside that we're finally creating this label. I can't wait until you can meet up with Trav, Nate, Marq and Slim so we can all just change the world with this man. We've known each other since we were in diapers practically. We've got in trouble with each other. We've written stories together. And though you may not be up here in NY as much anymore, best believe that whenever you are it's like you were never gone. We never got to graduate on the same stage, but Kindergarten was our practice step, for this. I don't know what my life would be like if I never met you. But, I'm glad I got to. We need to stick together—we're the same blood—we're the same kids. We're brothers, and brothers don't abandon each other. Best buds for life. Mike Martial, my ingenious engineer and mixer. You gave the sometimes rather blurry sounds of my conscience, clarity. You heard things for this project I never imagined. And as a producer and rapper yourself, you were able to give a tone to the project that added to the message in a greater manner than I ever originally was conveying on each track. Some of them didn't even sit well with me at first, but as I listened, things just got better and better. I'm glad that my father and I met you. Your vigor changed this project into an unbelievable dream. Thank you for all your effort and constant work. Anything I ever do will always be brought to you. Kester "Kedar" Lynch for your wise and always positive words for the project. You believed in it the moment I came to your door step and I'm glad you were able to come along for the ride. Thank you for your time and effort on this project. You made sure you came to every Sunday session you could no matter what the circumstances. I'll never forget after financing us with all the Chinese food orders and your famous codfish delectable sandwiches—that you cooked a full meal for us and brought it all the way from Queens out to Brooklyn. That's commitment and that's the love you brought to us and shared with us every week. This project would have been so incredibly different without you. Your being brought such a family-like element to the studio. It didn't matter what was being recorded, there was never any judgement. There was just full honesty and continuous encouragement to make every track the very best it could be. You added to the most intricate details that made this whole thing up and with that I will forever be in your debt. I hope you will be able to return for that role in all my other ventures as time progresses. Peace, love and blessings my brother. To Aja Eden Adam. We've been through a lot. Sometimes more than I deserved. Sometimes more than you needed to deal with. But I'm glad regardless of our struggles, we've stayed friends. Your eye as a photographer has always interested me. Ever since I met you and knew you had that talent, I think I always knew I wanted you to photograph something valuable for me. I didn't know how important that photograph would be, but it turns out it was my first musical effort. I'm glad you were able to be apart of this as well as help me for the filming of 14 St. I hope to work with you again in the same field or on maybe even something greater. Love you. Stephanie Rios. "Hey. Hello. Hi." We used to greet in Crayola with "Yellow(s)!" and "Green(s)!" but officially, those latter three words are the three ways I've found I can't contact you. I haven't reached out to you in the longest and I guess that's because maybe I've been working on this or I've been seeing things differently. I'm glad everything is going great for you where you are. And I hope when you see how much you—or rather the concept of you—is actually involved in this project, you don't take it the wrong way. Hopefully you see it the same way you saw "The Tale", because simply, that's what it is. You've been someone I have always made sure I could keep an arm out to and also something I could keep a handle on. I shouldn't do that, I shouldn't have done that, but I do—I won't anymore really. There's a lot on here that I always tried to say to you through a text or a voice message, but maybe hearing it like this resonates purer and more clearly. We may never meet in person but at least we'll know what each other's voices sound like. You know? You're a beautiful Virgo angel whose intelligent, loving, motherly spirit was handcrafted by God himself. You are you. No one else. I'm glad about that. I don't think I would have wanted to ever meet another Stephanie Rios. Hopefully you'll always remember that regardless of if I say so or he says so or someone else does. Hopefully even when people try to say otherwise, you'll know. Just know. Don't think about anything else but that. Doing you is what keeps you—I don't know—you. And I like that. You truly are the compass of this tape and the matriarch of it's beauty. You are the definition of this tape. You are Magnificent. Me: "What do you want to be when you grow up Steph?" You: "Happy." I agree with you. I mean what else can we be right? We'll talk when we talk. Much love from your boy, Rod. ----------------------------------------------------------------------This tape was for your discretion. Anyone mentioned on this project in passing or blatantly was either used fictitiously or metaphorically for the sole purpose of relaying a message. To those brought up, I thank you for the ways that you impacted my life—whether that be positively, negatively or perhaps both. You've made up who I am today—which though in some ways isn't satisfying—is also better than the boy I was yesterday...---------------------------------------------------------------------- To the many others involved with this project: Lorem Vercetti, I never was able to reach you but I wanted to pay my respects to your work man. There were a couple KAFP instrumentals that I sorted through and could've taken use of, but yours was the most appealing to me. Also to Jarion Alexander, who alongside being one of the very first producers I've ever worked with (on our promotional, "The Tale"), did an amazing reproduction for Jharrel and I on "2 On". That rework on the second half of that song always jolts me into introspection. Giovanna Armstrong, I was first introduced to your work by my friend Kar'mel. Holy hell, I love your ear for samples and "Oncheezied" was to date one of the greatest beats I had heard on your SoundCloud. I'm glad I was able to get you on this project. Don't even worry about it, we're gonna work together again in the future. Bet on it. Drew Williams, we weren't in contact very long, but from what I gained from you—I learned how hungry you are to do art and rise above, satisfying your ambitions. In that way, we are very similar. I hope you enjoyed what I did for your rework of "What's the 411" as well as my production alongside it. Truly loved the collaboration—this song will always be a favorite of mine. DJ Abomination, we've contacted each other restlessly throughout the duration of this project. You're actually one of the first few producers I was interested in working with, as well as the first one I reached out to. Hope you loved the outcome of "Defender of the Castle", as well as Magnificent in general. It was fun tackling that instrumental as well as coming up with the right way to place it into the project's narrative. May the odds forever be in your favor man, you deserve it. Ionut Olteanu, I've fell in love with so many of your beats. Deeply sorry for the loss of your previous channel. I appreciate you allowed me to use your work for "Osiris" and even further, I'm grateful that you allowed me that opportunity before your channel closed down. So much of your work hits hard and I can't wait to hear where you go in the future. And finally, A-Rayz Music. You were the final source I contacted on this project. After hearing some of your production through a schoolmate of mine, I had to actually speak to you. Your work on "Carpe Diem" was able to free me from a long amount of writers block I had while working on Magnificent. I was able to finish the project happily by writing to it. And inevitably, Carpe defined the ending of the whole experience. I was happy. I was smiling. And hopefully, our listeners were too! To the over-arching inspirations: Robert Hall Jr., we briefly spoke on Twitter about me doing a cover of "Hip 2 Da Game". You've always been a legend in my book. Though we lost communication after a couple weeks, I'm so thankful and appreciate that you took the time to actually respond to me. You didn't have to, but by doing so you've pushed me further in so many ways. Mac Miller, the most dope. Your original version of KAFP was literally half my middle school years. I still listen to your stuff and I am so glad you've found your spot in the industry and have planted your seat. You honestly deserve it after all the work you put in with those tapes man. DJ Mustard, your music is everywhere I look. Seriously. EVERYWHERE. Usually if I listen to satellite radio, at least twice your production tag pops up. That's how fast you get out hits and thats how much effort you put into your production. As a musician myself, you've made me take notice of the types of vibrations music can create. With yours, it's always fun to listen to you—even if the concept and meaning in the song strays from that feeling—your production calls for people to party and enjoy their lives. Thank you for that introduction. Tinashe, I remembered hearing of you in passing by so many of my friends or people I spoke to online. When you dropped "2 On", I finally listened to you. Forever more you've had a fan. I'm happy your career is skyrocketing and heading into such a positive direction and I hope that always continues. Drake, one of the few straight up inspirations for this tape. Much of the tape was written as you rose into the limelight. Your work showed me that Hip-Hop didn't have to just be Hip-Hop. It could be way more genres in just that one. You're actually the first artist I can really say in the past decade who really defined for me what "Hip-Hop/R&B" was. Not many other artists were really proving to me why that slash was there between the two genres. I was hearing each of them separately until you blew up. In so many ways, you've showed me what music has grown to be and what it should continue to be. Hits. Lin-Manuel Miranda, your arrival as well as you and your original cast's speeches to my school's cast over our production of In the Heights did a lot for me. You have such eloquent words and such a soft spoken yet energetic personality. Meeting you changed a lot for that song (which among 2 others is still in production) and this entire project. Your poetry and lyricism has gone as far as to be acclaimed by Broadway just as well as by mainstream artists. That is something I forever hold as an ambition I want my life to—if not at least reach—surpass. Manu Chao, from the amount of work I've heard in your album Clandestino and on, I can honestly say that your name deserves more credit than it already has. While I know that much of that album reached and touched simply the hearts of those in foreign Europe and Spanish countries, it reached all the way over into mine here in the United States. Your versatility in languages has also been a great influence in my work—in fact you've caused me to take the concept of being bilingual and even trilingual very seriously now. I'm terribly itching to hear another album drop by you. Eddie Murphy, my king of comedy. I put you next to all the other greats. Cosby, Pryor, Cedric, Lawrence. But you'll always be my favorite. With just two stand-ups you showed the world how belligerent yet parodic comedy and even drama has the ability to be. While your music career is often overlooked and your acting career is often underpraised, I say confidently and proudly that all your work, including your films and music has inspired me in the realm of entertainment and always will. Mary J. Blige, to date all the way back to your first album shows how much I love your work. To be short, your evolution has been jaw-dropping. "What's the 411", as classic as it was and still is—without a doubt is so different and diverse in nature compared to your most recent works. I was introduced to the final song of that album by the photographer of this project, Aja Adam, and since, was in awe and unable to fathom at times how point A (What's the 411) got to point B (The London Sessions). Your voice to me has affected my generation to the likes of Patti Labelle and Chaka Khan in my father's years of youth. If men could have your voice (specifically if I could), I don't know how the world would respond. And to Joe McDermott, Allister Brimble, Nathan McCree and Keiichi Okabe, you are men who created the atmospheres and soundtracks of my childhood. You created the tunes I would hum everyday when I pretended to be in a zombie apocalypse, thought I could drive, wanted to venture into far off Egypt, practiced martial arts or just wanted to feel free from the stresses of my day. You also are one of the many inspirations for my original orchestrations and compostions. Thank you. And oh my Gosh! How could I ever forget yo?! HUGE shoutouts to PlayStation, Xbox, Windows and Macintosh. You are the realest of the real. The most underrated of the underrated. You all are harder than the coldest mountain peaks. YOU ARE THE REAL MVP'S. You have had my back since birth pretty much. You all were the main homies who came in clutch for this tape to happen. Whenever I was upset, whenever I was feeling a little too cocky so I went online or whenever I was bored out of my mind, you kept me going. You gave me just as many nightmares as you gave me dreams, but I forgive you for that. Seriously. I should have never sat and watched my Dad play Resident Evil 2. It has tormented me into my teenage years to the point where the destruction of such an intellectual erudition and segment of my childhood makes me cry heavy rains of tears.Capcom... Stop making RE games if you can't make them good.(I'm just joking around. This was a pretty long letter anyway, I had to break at some point.) And for the finale, to the main act who have sewn their souls and pure spirits so sweetly and courteously into this project: I thank you... Willow, Mama, my grandmother—for waking me up every morning for school when I was younger. For cooking my meals. For cleaning my clothes. For giving me words of wisdom and for teaching me how to do each of those things on my own as I've gotten older and I'm approaching manhood. Though I know you won't be here forever, I've counted everyday I've had with you and cherished you in every moment I can. Without you, I wouldn't be able to breathe. With you, every color is more colorful. Every word is more poetic. Our family is one because of you. We keep each other together. We look out for each other. When I come home I feel safest there because of your warmth and because of your uncontainable aura. I love you Mama, with every speck of my being. Tack, Papa, my grandfather—for bringing laughs into my life. For showing me the importance of frugality as well as taking life slow. For teaching me to enjoy the little things. For mending some of the tools of my childhood and growth (my game controllers, my action figures, my pens, my computers, my speakers, my keyboards, and eventually my heart whenever it collapsed). Thank you for sharpening my eyes and ears, refining my mind and always telling me to analyze the world around me. Thank you for financing my dreams and believing in them no matter how far fetched you may have ever believed they were. You've always made things happen for me. I'll pay you back one day. I promise. I will always remember you for that Papa. I will always hold you close to my heart. Prince, Daddy, my father—for leading me up this path to creativity and showing me just as many of the evils to avoid in this world as the beauties you've taught me to take part in. Yes, we've had rough patches. Whether it be at home, in the middle of the street, over the phone or even in the studio. We can tend to fight. We clash. But as hard as that gets sometimes, I still love you. I can't help but love you. This is just as much for everything you've worked to be as it is for everything I want to be and I have to be. Yes, I've runaway, yes, I've argued and yes, I may downright not listen sometimes. I'm a teenager. Sometimes, none of us can help it. I apologize. But, look at what we did. Look at how we got here. Look at where we're going. We're getting there. Don't you think she'd be proud? And by she... I mean my mother. Sugar. Dulcey. I only knew you for a number of years. But, they were enough years to know you and always remember you. Thank you for bringing me into this world. Thank you for being here when you could. Thank you for being the benevolent soul I needed most when you came around. I wish you were here. Greatly. I wish you could sit here with us, laugh, smile and input your own ideas into things. But then again, you do. I listen back to tapes that have your voice on them. Ideas you were spawning on the spot or ideas you were returning to and they rouse some of the most interesting and unthought of ideas I've ever had sometimes straight to me. Every once and a while I'll be sitting around just writing down lyrics or playing a song and I wonder where this specific note or that certain lyric precipitated from. Then I look up. And I think of you. Isn't it lovely? Lastly to God. To God, I obviously haven't done all I can. I obviously am less than a man. I say to you I've been searching for you. Why haven't you answered? I've argued about you. Argued for you. I've became so sore to your silence. Honestly it's so quiet. I'm so tired I would rather sleep sometimes than to sit hear without sound it's, Dead silent right here in my bedroom. I said to you the last time I prayed— I don't even remember what... Sometimes I'm discouraged And other times I like, resent not doing it. People say you don't exist. And though it seems you're proving it, In that same dead silence you're proving us wrong. You're here. You're hearing us. You're hearing us in your ears. We're just not listening enough to hear you in ours. We want you to cover our scars, But you're telling us to do it ourselves, We have to do just as much work as you for this to work. This is a working relationship. Occasionally you're a fable to me, But I know that you're there. I got so many quotes of you by my bedside, That it's hard to truly say that I think you're a lie. Boy am I tired. I told you I'm tired. So tired but inside I'm feeling the fire. Please God could you answer? My phones 'bout to die! But even if it does I'll still wait for a reply. Cause I'll climb to the highest mountain, And wait for the sun to rise, And hopefully there I'll hear a word from you by that time. Bye bye. I couldn't say it to you in just simple syntax. So I had to write it out like that. If you've gotten me this far, I'll wait to see how far it goes. I know you're taking care of me, and I hope you'll keep taking care of the people I need you to. Thank you. Thank you, thank you, thank you... I don't know what to say other than that.