HOT DAMN SCANDAL - "Mama Don't Watch You" - BRIDGE CITY SESSIONS

[Round 1: Soul Khan] See back then, the goal was musical buzz "What? You're saying you're above battle rap?" No, you dumb motherfuckers, I never said that I just had to pursue what I love If that's something you view as a snub, that's a you problem These rounds, Diz you really got a Jew problem Megaton better come with a new nuke on 'em Throat sores, so I'm goin' Michael Jordan with the flu on 'em Am I better than this? No But I'm better than you Not as a battler, listen, I'ma say this Not necessarily not as a battler, but as a person, that's what the evidence proves When I present it to you You might pretend it's a ruse And I intend to confuse You know what they say about those treacherous Jews I have a question for you Saw you vs Iron Shit's brilliant But now that this Jew got next, tell me How many Jew jokes have you got left? Hold on, let me guess; six million? But let me get back, to reflectin' and building on all that it happened Since I left the field like I was Dr. Manhattan I was living off of my rapping 'till I tied the knot, then I got into a tighter spot Then I had to find a job But Wait, sorry fuck So Diz', a job is a place where you go to make money Like an office or store You ever seen The Office before? It's like that, but less funny And then you get a check You can spend it on your food and ya rent Fuck, I'm doing it again So Diz', rent... I'll take it slow See rent is this thing where you know find a place, and you pay money to stay monthly See, I ain't know if you're aware of it, because you ain't left your parents till your fuckin' late 20s So according to you, right, on Twitter you called me a "manchild" The audacity! That you, mister level headed adult YOU called me a "manchild" that is damn wild You were living with your mom and dad while I was in my own crib, diggin' up dirt on QP for that damn file Back to that Iron battle, you know I gotta say The angle about Jews not going to work on 9/11, kinda clever Except you didn't go to work on 9-- ever See down the line I went through shit My crew split As too did my creative drive, my will to stay alive took a huge dip And my momma got too sick Down to a toothpick And I stopped makin' music See the sad thing is Diz, you said I tried and I flopped Nah, it was going fine, then I stopped It was painful, truly See, I know it sounds sad, but Soul is still a Joker though I ain't talking about the Gotham kind Talking like Persona 5 That is what I was personified Cause I lost track of all the kind of monsters I had caught inside Especially the one whisperin' to me that I oughta die So bottom line, there is nothing you can say to me That is more evil than the shit I used to tell myself all the time I got out that coma I been frozen lately I gotta thanks all the homies that could motivate me Even though the road was shaky Like the way Dizaster's parents thought it was okay to hold a baby So now y'all here to see my return to the format You here to be my personal doormat Hold up Before we go all that Do battle rappers still say dumb shit like "you catch a shell, then you sleep like Squirtle and Snorlax"? No, good Well ignore that, fantastic You know, I respect you Diz, because you're willing to give someone the shirt off your back Even when they didn't need it, or were asking you for that He takes his shirt off all the time And I know you like to make fun of the way I make apologies Lot of liberals are faker than astrology I'm not a liberal, I'm a leftist, and the difference is tremendous And there's one thing I have to say, it's gotta be legit I am sorry, for every bomb that Israel has ever launched at Lebanon They always got a reason and each of them is fucking extra wrong The IDF level houses, you know, bring fiery death on thousands Maybe someone you knew Nah I ain't pushing no button, but, Israeli government always said they do it in the name of the Jews This ain't a angle or a gimmick, fuck the haters and the cynics But I refuse to accept that any Jew is protected by doing something so fuckin' hateful to you On top of all that And all the while, the West Bank has gotten terrorized Every day in Gaza's genocide And America could end it by threatening to ends its ties But they just always defend it And the Palestinians get left to die At this point, Diz probably thinkin' This ain't therapy Diz, that ain't fair to me Because I gotta grapple in my disgrace And my old battles are like your face, they've aged terribly And to everybody, to all you who suggested; "No SJW stuff" I've reviewed your request, and, shut the fuck up! I know they hate it when I do this, but sorry, I'm accountable So, I am sorry if I have hurt anyone who was marginalized with the words that I'd use Especially cause it doesn't reflect my personal views I fucked up so much And that's being accountable Being a fuckin' shithead is not a fuckin' alpha move And it's like fuckin', and I'm not talkin' about like some light politeness like not talking when ya mouth is full [Dizaster] I'm the only one reacting [Soul Khan] And that's why it's the best line See what you refer to as political correctness is just giving some respect for a minute or a second, it's forethought And if you dismiss and reject it Cause you think it's makes you different or you're edgy You're not So, what to do? Diz, what are your preferred gender pronouns? Usually say like he, him, his, whatever So mine are he, him, his Look at how easy that it is It only takes fuckin' two seconds But all these anti PC motherfuckers will complain for hours about it And how PC it is So let me make the math There are more than two genders, your eyebrows look like two sweaters Disgustingly huge pairs, fuck tweezers, use Nair I bet the effort it takes to groom is tremendous If you have one square up there, you'd win at Tetris I mean this in the kindest way So what happened? Everything that happened after Math, I have to ask Should I be scared of you? Or do you only attack me if I dare you to? Diz, Diz, c'mon man, are you, wait a second Am I getting this right Will you do anything to anybody dares you to? Are you sure? Challenge accepted Too bad Consent negative, my bad Alright so, JK, you can't be that, don't do that, always say that Anyway so, challenge accepted Diz...I dare you to kiss me I mean my man I ain't pausin' shit, I ain't pausin' shit In 2019, we past pausin' Hold up, hold up Can anyone else do this shit It ain't scary or risky Go back to the hotel, share some whisky My girl's okay with it C'mon tough guy, you gon' kiss me or not? C'mon! No! You gon' kiss me Hold on, this the important part C'mon tough guy, you gon' kiss me or not? Put Your Money Where Your Mouth Iz, King of the Dot! [Dizaster] This was his plan to defuse all my shit. Is it my turn? [Soul Khan] So, no, no man. This is a long round. I'm doing a long round for you! It's for you! I dare you I dare to not rap forever and render this unwatchable I dare you to fight our friend Math and not end up in the hospital I can't fly all the way to see it In any case, I dare you to make a song that isn't absolute garbage So you could be an actual artist Instead of pretending to be the rapper you aren't But...also sir, I gotta say, those braids They are ridiculous dude If you hate the culture vultures, you officially lose You look like a white girl gettin' her groove on a Caribbean cruise But Hold on Diz, is this some sort of style of hair of Arabs I'm unaware of? I mean this shit is you? No, this shit is new I remember the old days, when your hair used to be You would see In a park full of skaters So many spikes it was like your barber was playing a game of Mario Maker If you wanna use Sega Your coif is a mess dawg Out there looking like Islamic the Hedgehog Wait a second though, I'm sensitive to this shit Is that offensive to y'all, or the, you watching at home Cause I felt it was like borderline Sorta like when Madness called me Jew-Pac Shalom Which is funny- Diz, my friend is Is it offensive to you Diz? Might be a reason to pretend that it is We both know a secret You oughta know Let me take you back I recently remembered When you and I were at Club Excess In a pit like this Doin' shit like this And Diz was saying, this and that, I wasn't listening You know what Diz is like? It's a thing Thing, the moment that burned in my memory Is when he turned and he said to me Yo bro, it's funny, I ain't exactly Muslim shit And I was like, what? good lord! Diz, are you telling us? That through your entire battling career, and you've been battling for years, a third of your life, earning your stripes You led us to believe that you're Muslim, and this whole motherfucking time You never actually said one You not exactly, I never was gonna say that See he says, I never said I was a Muslim But you say it in the battles, not the interviews But every time the interviewer calls you Muslim, you never correct or interrupt him That's disgusting Don't play, I ain't a bit amused Cause-- [Dizaster] I'm an offshoot of Islam, that's why [Soul Khan] Nhhh, yeah that's debatable But relatable So Well no I'm talking in your relation on what you do You misrepresent yourself to your fans and to your opponents I want them to take themselves back to the moments And the raps that you told em Using cultural standings that ain't actually holding Are you of the mind that just because racist thinks all Arabs are in terror groups That that makes it fair for you To uphold the stereotypes of terror too? What about Muslims who aren't Arab, dude? You don't know think South Asians and African Muslims get hassled at customs? Or that their women in hijabs and burkas are afraid of getting shot and murdered Due to the rise in fucking Islamic, anti-Islamic fervor? So he has a rebuttal I'm sure that shit is subtle You know a lot of the old Jewish lines I had were fucking foolish But the difference between that and you is I'm actually fucking Jewish Like, this here, was his decision And now we in this position You hate the cultures vultures, what are you, a religion pigeon? I mean obviously You're Arab, so you know the language and the basic protocol But you faking overall I guess Dizaster is just Arabic for Rachel Dolezal Either way, you lied so these people have no reason to even slightly believe you Or I have just freed you To finally be you Diz, do you hear this Do you recognize the scheme See where I'm trying to lead you It's Soul Khan, from the last tribe of the Hebrews Listen Diz, you can admit it Honestly, you don't wanna do it out loud And that's just too much to ask though That's fine If you're not Muslim, just stand here, looking like the world's stupidest asshole Oh damnit, I'm so proud of you That probably took a lot of you Right? Honestly I don't wanna do anything more on this verse But if this contest of a honor, pride and our worth It's just a motherfucking homicide in the first But, if that ain't enough You just get to serve me I don't give a fuck Cause in 2021, your president is Bernie (Diz: you done?) I could be, hold on I like you just wobbling back and forth (Diz: c'mon pull something out, c'mon rebuttal something) No, I don't want to right now Just looking at you like, sorta like, wobbling, yeah go Diz, it's your turn [Round 1: Dizaster] Oh it's my turn? Y'all ready for some shit?! What the fuck was that? What the fuck was that? Ay trust me, we gon get to the Muslim in round 3, but right now Woo! We gotta address fucking MC Dry Milk This ain't a battle, this a race to see which one of us gon' be the first to get this guy killed Me, or his white guilt Fucking Soul Khan I'm not the person to step to Yeah, we gon' start off with this because honestly, I'm not here to psychologically test you I'm here to open up a door, for everybody to get through Just like a West Hollywood rest room If I get mad today, I'mma just say "F you" Instead of wishing death on you, I'ma just wish I never met you He wants to gender stuff, we can all be men, women too, c'mon Even though y'all don't believe it, a lot of y'all like to pretend to Just like your mom did to fulfill the role of your pops when he left you Left you, without a dope beat to step to Step one: this a battle, I ain't gotta respect you Step two: you only here cause the rent's due Your bitch left you And the music not bringing the checks through Step three: he couldn't make a return unless he Went against me The leader of the LGBT Going against a WMD He's a proud SJW He's G-L-A-D to be the CEO of a bunch of new groups A-B-C-D-E-F-G's The H-I-J-K-L-M-N-O-P's The Q-R-S, the T-U-V's, and don't you forget those X-Y-Z's Are you fucking kidding me? You said you quit battle rap, what you back here using us for? You said you wouldn't return till you had a Grammy You think we forgot the stupid shit you used to say and do from before You said you was done with this game, you gon make go music and hit the booth and record I guess it's safe to say he's back with the Canadians since America couldn't give this Jew no award (Juno Award) Hold on, hold on How long you gonna fucking hold on for? It's been 9 years of you holdin' on Recording songs We thought you would blow up by now man, what's going on? Why have you not got put on? I thought you'd have some soul hits by now, but you don't What a shocker, Khan (Chaka Khan) I thought Brown Bag was growin' strong But now you trying to weasel your way in with us and sneak back in and just roll along And you want us to welcome you with open arms Like I'm the vulture, pff, like we wouldn't notice you wrong Right now, you walkin' in so many different directions, you like a child outside tryin' to find a Pokémon And this is how all these silver spoon posers are The moment they don't get what they want, that's the moment they gone And I stayed here, puttin' in blood, sweat and tears, helping put this culture on And that will always be the difference between your pros and your cons (Khans) Khan you a fuckin' con artist You know what rhymes with "Soul Khan"? (What?) "This guy spends more time with Nancy Pelosi than he does with his own mom" But now he's back, and he's focused on Battle rap, he's back like he never left Returnin' in the era of gun rhymes, pickin' the one guy that could give you punchlines and multis Multiplied by hundred times of deaths, so follow the pattern Cause you ain't getting the one liners yet Fuck a gun rhyme Bring your little anti-gun sign Cause I ain't got a gun I'm here to contaminate ya bloodline with a rusty knife instead Puncture puncture, slice Make your skull rupture like there was busted waterpipe of lead Gushing by your head Get your onion diced, I'll oven fry your egg Cut and slice your chest Open up ya eye with it Leave it stuck inside your neck And watch the whole other side go dead like the Butterfly Effect They put a butter knife against a butterfly knife This is the different between cookie cutter rhymes and someone who designs lines to be cutting edge All you got is these lies you spread You literally talk out the side of your neck I'm really cut throat So if you running ya mouth, you'll catch a Columbian necktie if I see a tongue comin' out Watch out You a bum now I been on my Nate Dogg shit Watched ya high come down I became the professor of this campus You dropped out as a Cub Scout Since you returned as one of my students, well this could only one route Oh you don't think I'm your teacher huh Well you will when I blaow, have you spittin' your gums out Phluh, now you have a yuck mouth (Yukmouth) You see the signs when the Blood starts to come out Speaking of cuttin', you cut ya legacy short And you pressured to come back in the game cause you're stuck now And we supposed to welcome you like this successful legend like... What the fuck? How? Cause he got 3,000,000 views versus QP? Fuck, wow Since then, I left that in a dust cloud While you spent the rest of your career like "50 Cent trying to knock another SON down." Got so outta touch, he's like Al Bundy to us now Which means ya battles with Madness, Fox, Deacon, QP would be your four famous touchdowns Fuck outta here, you like the Gjonaj of Polk High You wonder why he ain't come down to no actual battles? He's too busy at the farmer's market tryin' to haggle over free salad samples He went from being a savage asshole To hangin' out with 6 foot women who wear Versace sandals and have Adam's Apples And before we got the horrible, horrible, horrible news that you quit You can admit, this dude who was sick He just hasn't, you know, been the same dude ever since they surgically removed his dick He had a surgeon open up two little slits and fuse a clit made out of a pair of two human lips On to the passageway where he used to piss And if you think this is bad, we're lucky he hasn't grew any tits He's a fuckin' neutered Shih tzu with a uterus Used to be a symbol of manhood like Mr. Bruce but all we got left is this confused little bitch Oops, did I just say the "b" word? You used to be as ruthless as it gets Now you don't use the word "bitch"? Are you kidding me? You bitch! You're the biggest misogynist ever...and you still are You don't get to change the rules as you wish You might be able to fool these stupid little new liberal groups that you with But the beautiful thing about the internet is that it's forever...and Google is quick And YouTube is just two little clicks {click click} Exhibit A: You once told a dude, "You're useless as a chick without the coochie and the tits" Listen, "useless as a chick without the coochie and the tits" Now I caught some slack for what I said to O'fficial But I'll be honest, this some futuristic shit! Now this same dude's a feminist? Man that's as stupid as it gets Like you callin' people gay for all three of your rounds on all your old YouTube clips And now your excuse for it Is that you grew up since And you weren't worried about whose kids you were going to influence Or is it truly this? That your new political views don't fit with the way that you used to spit So you must've turned vegan too cause all of a sudden you super quick to come to a fruit's defense God damn man, you too intense You suffering from self delusion of how you view yourself Staring back at the mirror like, "Who is this?" "Who am I?" Who is this?" I'll tell you who You're the dude who called people "homos" and "queers" for most your career So if you wanna act like we're the ones that are homophobic here Ehhh that's sorta weird Cause, I used to like you Soul Khan, at least back then you were more sincere You once saw two dudes in the distance arguing about who says the word "faggot" more And you told the dude that was standing next to you, "Yo. Hold my beer." He's a fuckin' Fruit Ninja The type that no one fears When he throws a bomb, he throws a bomb But when the smoke screen clears He reappears with a picket sign and a pair of pink pointy ears Like, "I'm Soul Khan. Ready to fight this war Standing on the frontline with my big homie Michael Moore." Soul Khan, been a Socialist for so long his hands and knees is sore Had sunken cheekbones like a Swedish whore He consumes Twitter feeds, he doesn't even eat no more He's no longer the person he used to be before Just to act as his own manhood he has to speak to it through a Ouija Board I am literally raising Hell! And after this you might as well change your name as well I'ma make you hate yourself When you leave here you gonna feel the same way you felt when you watch the new Dave Chappelle Face it, you just outdated You basic and stale, tryin' to break away from the shell Your music sucks, no one gives a fuck if you sell So tonight, you gon' be like Sheriff Hopper Cause you gon' have a tough time puttin' up with this L (El') I'm an O.G King Of The Dot knows there's no show if there's no me I go O.D I'm like Eleven from Stranger Things Cause I can even channel my energy to reach the nose bleeds Got me teleporting like a flesh absorbing demogorgon The best in this sport, I'm forever Jordan The game change, became way colder Caught him slippin' in the Range Rover Start [?] with the flamethrower He wants to ban AK's then fuck it, the shotgun can hit you from way closer Operation Roc-A-Wear with Jay Hova I'll put your brain on your Dame's shoulders Awe man, here we go again {Diz puts on Groucho glasses and pulls out a folder and starts his Soul Khan impression} He said, "Brains on my Dame's shoulder" Hold on, hold on That's why guns are bad for you Diz' And any true human will tell you that every firearm leads to a mass school shootin' Listen, hold on, hold on Before I leave any session you know I got a few more lines Yeah, yeah, you will realize and do more time That people like Twork are bad for the community Cause they inspire my precious black youth to do more crime So if you ever decide to use your tool Fuck you, fuck you B. Dot you cool Fuck you! [Round 2: Soul Khan] When he was in my face, I think, it probably hit me I was just thinking, wow, has he reconsidered my offer to kiss me? Diz, you're my homie though But hold it man And I ain't trying to diss that flag you're wearin' But I gotta say, it was kinda disorienting, for this dude who's my homie y'all To talk about Pokemon when he literally looks like a fucking Pokeball So, we got this So, my friend, are you done? If not, that's cool son I mean, I was just gonna go make a food run I get you some I was gonna cop some jerky, want a Slurpee? Red or the blue one? You ain't gotta choose, you want the blue one How you think this gon' go, 2-1? Lot of people think you gon get 3-0'd I mean that'd be pretty sweet yo I mean, cause this shit is something you need for your ego Me though? I be known For some other shit that you think that we share, but when you compare, we don't So, who here knows the song 'Fahrenheit'? See cause people can sing along with that Telling me you never feel like you wanted that Honestly Diz', you was showing your rectum If you say you have as close a connection As I do fans across the entire emotional spectrum I mean you have laughter, and over-aggression I'm there for them when they lonely and desperate Or when they're hopeless, hopeful, or breathless When someone shows them affection I'm there for them whatever they're living through Whether they're training or in their living room That's a sense of fulfillment I wish I could give to you But I can't But dammit I fucking pity you I'm not in a battle gonna try to outrap or outflow you But on a track I will roast you Because you adapt when the Pro Tools are tracking your vocals Or at least that's what's born out of by some other examples we'll go through So, namely You gave your mom a beautiful Mother's Day freestyle Right? It was gorgeous It was written down That does not make this better what I'm about to say My friend, you gave your mom a freestyle for Mother's Day There had to be another way I'm talking flowers and cards Instead of powerful bars! If I was your mom I had wish you were a runaway And honestly when I started watching it Get really intense body language Gotta be anxious Gotta inching forward like he was gonna pull the straps on her Look like you were about to Math Hoffa ya damn momma Now, for the record If I you wanna watch this, I made a shortcut Tinyurl.com/dizmom Alright? Please join with me if you watching at home or later on Youtube Because I love my mother too And I've got time My friend, we gonna go through all this shit line by line Actual quote Diz said to his mom "you're my sword when I'm swordless" Why in God's name did you record this? Hold on though! If you're swordless, then your hand or wherever you sheathe it By definition is not where your sword is Bear with me If I gotta I break it down, you understand Just switch the metaphor with the shit's that's intended for You're saying You're my mom and when I'm momless Which, my mom would be appalled if She thought I thought that she wanted such incompetent dog shits The next line is you're my spiritual fountain Spiritual fountain! I wanna hear all about them My friend is a spiritual fountain more like a lyrical fountain or a miracle fountain Spiritual fountain The last line of this, blew my mind with this You're my breath when I'm drowning Now When you drown, you lose air So based on the sequence of the line And the meaning that's implied She is not keeping you alive, she is leaving you to die But honestly, she seems really kind, no disrespect intended to your mom Especially, cause all the shit Diz has said, and done It's amazing Diz isn't done So Can we clap it up for Dizaster's mom Now, the next example is a song that's actually your best If that were case for me, I would be massively impressed It's called 'Don't Play Me' produced by Chase Moore That means the best aspect of a track ain't yours Literally said, I'mma say this real slow for everyone to see This was written down too, right? It is? oh c'mon "I'll strike you with a Midas touch and grab your wife and fuck Till the hymen bust open like a fire hydrant wide and fire trucks driving sideways on the highways till I fuck my tires up" I guess in that fires are chaotic and fuck everything up But like, now, because I am a masochist and I've got time We gon' tackle this line by line Hold on By the way, tinyurl.com/dontplaydiz Oh I forgot, hold on wait a second, you know what rhymes with tinyurl.com/dizmom Diz lied about his bond with Islam Okay, so look Back to this this Magnum Opus So, "I'll strike you with a Midas touch and grab your wife and fuck" So the touch of Midas turn whatever you hold into genuine gold Like it's treasure in a vault So what you saying is If someone gave you this incredible ability You would use it to commit sexual assault You are a great ambassador for this culture by the way Let's go to this, "till the hymen bust open like a fire hydrant wide and fire trucks" Jesus Christ I guess you're not aware that hymens don't bust, actually kinda tear Even then it's a misconception that's kinda rare Diz, do you know what a hymen looks like Hold on, do you know what a vagina looks like I see the gears turning I hear them ears burning He wants to rebuttal me Like, "of course I've seen a vagina, it's standing right in front of me Auhh I'm in Oakland Now I'm standing over here in Oakland" Next line This the wild shit "like a fire hydrant wide and fire trucks driving sideways on the highways till I fuck my tires up" Are you the fire truck? Like a Transformer? Are you stunt driving like the Transporter Are you like some fireman deplorably ignoring his last order I don't get it Diz, the problem is also here is that the wife would also end up gold Right? Story there, somewhat I can't tell if you're trying to cuckold or fuck gold And I don't know if this is a minus or plus But if she's making of gold, the hymen won't bust And you know, gold, [?], that's strong material You know what's not strong material? Ya song material And that's ya best song, goddammit, it's frustrating I want to set up a rap camp And we'll see you this summer Ness can teach you flow Mac can teach you structure Maybe I don't know, I don't know people are new, Geechi Gotti would be an instructor To help you not sound like such a geeky motherfucker But I don't sound that weird Diz, those beautiful braids When I said you oughta to explore your artistry more I didn't mean you should cosplay as the guitarist from Korn This is you every time you perform "to me, you're nothing but a future corpse If this fragile little Jewish dork Even imagines using force I will Luchadore slam his little form And use him as a tuning fork No one gives a fuck about the stupid music you perform I will build you a casket, fill it with padding Just for keeping the acoustics warm I'm hotter than the Human Torch Which is actually funny, cause if you were born back in the 20s In your grandparents' country, you would be a human torched You are only the goat Because all Jews were born With a pair of hooves and horns" You want us to think you're destined to kill a man Nah, you look like you stuck between steps in the Thriller dance And you still advance If I had to change ya name to encapsulate the raid of trash you aggregate it would be Edward Fillerhands What was that advice that Patrick had told you? Relax, let em go loose But yet, every time you use your arms, I'm imagining Goku at the supermarket examining produce Diz You always down for unlimited rounds like you Solid Snake Here's something you should consider now, consolidate I'm here to Marie Kondo out your closet space You have always lived in, but never exist in, an Islamic State You are getting so fucked up that it could become someone's fetish Complete with its own subreddit I hope that one of my old fans came to Oakland and grew up to become medics Cause this level of blood shedding is upsetting Like a pump of unleaded Fuck buttin' heads, I am getting ready to behead him Khan's flow, A.C. Cowlings with the Bronco Kicking over lawn gnomes You be dropping N bombs and you ain't got the launch codes Oakland, California, can you hit me with the amen Ay man, sicker than a vape pen Diz be always whining like an infant in his playpen Begging for respect that he's never gonna get, like Ricky and his grade 10 For me...nothing you'll ever say is gonna hurt me Cause in 2021, son, the president is Bernie [Round 2: Dizaster] Wow, thank God Y'all ready for rapping again?! Now, when Soul Khan around anyone from the SONS, even the lesser ones It's like he can smell it in the air Earlier today he met Brixx Belvedere and he was like, "Hmmm. I feel like I know you from somewhere." And Brixx was like, "Ummm. I don't really-" He's like, "Yeah. I feel like I do. I feel like I know you from somewhere before." And Brixx was like, "Okay, okay man. I'm not with the SONS anymore." "Ah ha! I caught you. Now feel the wrath as the lightening strikes down If Conceited don't wanna battle me, fuck it Brixx I'll battle your right now!" Bernie, Bernie, Bernie This fuckin' pacifist, passive aggressive attitude obviously isn't workin' Cause bro all you do is judge people and talk about politics And if you think that's okay that's obviously a problem you need to solve first then Cause it's probably no worse than Somebody who spends all of his time absorbing other people's opinions online To the point they actually forget to be their own person He introduces himself as, "Hi I'm a Socialist." Why don't you say, "I'm Noah" first then, help us help you discover your core version? Cause even though you lost as fuck, I don't gotta be up here with you soul searchin' I can't even find you, there's no person You used to be merciless, no mercy, then went cold turkey, no cursin' Even ripped up the old verses where he wrote cursive Fell flat on his back then returned to the old circuit Lookin' so nervous, feelin' more worthless Shaking below surface It's unfortunate when you decide to put the word "Soul" in your name and find out you ain't got a soul or a sole (soul) purpose It's over It's not even at the end of the show and it's closed curtains I'ma put him in a bag and zip him up Cause I'm focused now, so if one of these little guys in the crowd try to interrupt I don't give a fuck Listen, I came here to rip you up If this is your hero then I must really be a heel cause I'm only a couple inches away from having Soul (sole) lifted up You a baby Chihuahua bitch boy Which means, you bark like you big and tough But you really just a little pup And you ain't ready for the final level of Contra bitch, your heart's not big enough Yeah, he wants to protest against the guns "Bernie" But go ahead I don't need one Long blade split down the middle but the edge is rough I'll fuckin', I'll fuckin', I'll fuckin' I'll slice under the belly and give him a little nip and tuck I'll create a new move called "The Sitting Duck" I'll vertically swing it up And knock the lash off his eyeball before he can even blink it once You think I give a fuck? You think I give a fuck if the crew's filming us? Yeah, put this on film and just Rearrange your facial features on camera and twist ya little pixels up I'll completely ruin your definition and get to slicing and get to edit stuff And finish up with {slicing sound} I call that, "The Director's Cut" And guess what (What?) It still isn't enough! I gotta send it back to the Blacksmith so he can sharpen the ridges and add the finishing touch BING Now it's welded smooth and it's extra new I call it, "The Confession Booth" cause it'll make you spill your guts You fuckin' little bitch I.E.D. in the building Underneath your feet I'll blow this whole building up You wouldn't survive the blast if you rolled up here with the same armor on as Gizmoduck Bitch, all you got is the 1/2, 1/2 simple punch Recycled puns, played out ones Same typical order Cliché fat joke Cliché race joke And he doesn't even think of the jokes, he's an Internet quoter This is literally the Billy Crystal of Windows Explorer But you're more of a nerd with a mental disorder Which makes you Joaquin Phoenix cause you not even the original Joker Bitch, you know what you are? Ha, he said he makes music, you a shitty performer You a little fuckin' leftist libby little sissy New Yorker You a dime a dozen hipster Making his songs with his little rhythms on his mini recorder Then transfers them into his home studio through his mini controller You think I give a fuck about being a political soldier or a registered voter? You right bitch I'm [?] from the mountains of the [?] Yeah, and I'ma go out smokin' in the middle of a forest gettin' lit like Christopher Dorner You talkin' to someone who's really been in a war I have crossed the Syrian border Versus someone who speaks on our shit like a distant reporter Like, "Oh no. Those kids got hit by a mortar... Well vote for Bernie and he'll pass that executive order." Fuck Bernie Sanders! You a fuckin' hypocrite Fresco- Actually I like Bernie But the point is, you a hypocrite You- this is someone who literally told Fresco he was gay cause he was into yoga Then nine years later he goes on Queenzflip and tells him that he's into yoga I don't know if it's me or him or he's trying to undo every line he's ever said You went from accusing people of being homosexual for slightly wearing their pants tight around their legs To letting a grown man help you put your own legs behind your head Yeah man, you're some type of tough rapper All that learning how to do Pilates and shit, there can only be one answer He's trying to learn how to become more flexible So the next time he becomes depressed over Trump, he can curl up in a ball that much faster "Fuck Trump!" "Fuck Dizaster!" He's an activist for the poor Democrat pamphlets on the board So I showed up to his house cause I was curious, what was all this activism for Soon as I got to his front steps I was greeted by two buff ass tomboys with their arms crossed standing at the door They said, "What's the password?" I said, "Faggot" One of them raised their hands like this and said, "You now have access to the floor." I said, "Thanks, but I'm not going in." "Well why not?" I said, "Cause this is kinda, sorta, really not my thing." "Wait a minute. Are you a homophobe?" "Homoph- Nah, I love gay people." That's when the other one said, "That's it! I've had enough of your shit man! You need to leave bro." And that's when I said, "Bro?...You just assumed my gender!" "Well yeah. You're totally a bro man." I was like, "What?! I'm not a woman. I'm not in-between and I'm not a man." "Well what are you then?" I said, "I'm a- a- I IDENTIFY AS A PLANT! I said a plant!" "But bro you can't!" I said, "Wait a minute. Are you a plant-aphobe?" "Plant-aphobe? Aw, aw nah. We're totally not plantaphobes, we love plants." I said, "Well then you will address me as that Do you understand? "Actually. I do understand Like, like how you're going through self expression Like a vegan going through depression. I totally can dig it man I mean Plant! I mean Plant! Fuck I mean Plant. Sorry." That's what it's like dealing with you idiots I mean PLANT! God fuckin' damn Goddamn I forgot the part I gotta freestyle now You not a real Jew I didn't have no Jew bars until now You don't rock a Fedora Wait, you not a real Jew you rock a Fedora You not a real Jew you don't follow the Torah You got LED lightbulbs in your home you don't got no Menorah You not from Jerusalem, you from eastside Sodom and Gomorrah And over there you control the set Speaking of Gomorrah (Gamora), I'm Marveled at how your personalities both connect When I walk you off close to the ledge and watch you drop onto the rocks over the edge What you don't get it? I'ma have Soul Stone'd to death Bitch, we been on our grizzly while you overslept A fuckin' California bear who's been in the New York Zoo for so long he became a domesticated home owner's pet That shit you was cryin' on blogs you was supposed to get? I stayed here and got those enormous checks Cause I kept on workin', wakin' up in cold sweats Workin' on these words, learnin' how to make more metaphors connect While you got a legacy that's a Rolodex of homophobic insults to the most effect You spit shit that your political views don't reflect But you've grown up since You've changed now, you're not a sexist, you quit it Like you would let a racist white guy tell you, "You know what? I'm no longer racist and you gon' let me get away with it." You a fuckin' hypocrite, contradict yourself in every statement you make You just too fake to admit it Cause you're really a closet fuckin' racist and that's why you got so many regrets And the difference between me and you is I had a clean conscious when I said it You understand me? This guy got nothin' but basic linguistics, he's way too simplistic He gave up and quit Jeffrey Epstein, it's clear he was never able to hang to begin with Aw shit, this shit is painful He gon' get a face full of stitches Paid In Full shit Yeah, I'ma get creative with this You think I hate you cause of your race? Y'all are the chosen ones, man An old generation that's bathing in riches I'm just mad at you cause you're the only Jew that hasn't created a business How scary is this? My race angles are very vicious I can put an end to a conversation with a Jew with two words; "Merry Christmas" [Round 3: Soul Khan] I fear like there's gotta be an explanation of the actual definition of hypocrisy So, a hypocrite is someone who says one thing and does different shit Whereas I changed my entire life so your criticism doesn't apply And here's another thing that you should regard quick I didn't flop like I said, I quit music for a while You're a terribly listener, no wonder your music is garbage You think I'm a bigger geek than you My friend, you're an anime obsessed fucking weeaboo I heard that got married, congratulations Do you call her your waifu? Like the awkwardest white dude Did you propose to her with cherry blossoms and haiku's If it weren't for the fact that she probably wipes you I'd say, she probably feels like she got a 9th grader When she asks you to clean the bathroom, and you're like, "you mean the Hyperbolic Time Chamber?" What about the sex? Is it hotter when you roleplay As Inuyasha and Kagome Now, do you think Diz is ever domestically violent? Heck no I'd say he never try it And every time him and his wife get into a fight, she finds a way to let go While you go in your basement and write her name in the Death Note Diz talks about the streets, he isn't from there He's from our neighborhood, where the hot topic is that Hot Topic was replaced by Pacific Sunwear And the fact that you share a zip code with [?] just goes to show You ain't naturally large, you just actually scarred And have low impulse control Are you okay man? you're doing okay, you'll get through with it And that's why your parents are afraid you'll share the fate of Sharon Tate So every black friend of Dizaster is a professional actor that his parents paid to scare him straight It's not working I think I have a question They probably bail you out of all sorts of stupid shit that you do So It is, I'mma have to ask you, are you actually cool with? The fact that you supported Trump and therefore backed a political movement that doesn't actually consider black people a human? You okay man? you look so upset So I'll say this Leupold good snooze, he's falling asleep, falling asleep, okay cool I heard your guns are lethal, popping with them tools Correction, all your guns are legal, officer approved 'cause ain't nothing more gangster than following the rules Something that I noticed, when you first [?] around, you didn't spit gun bars a lot when you came into the circuit How was it? Crafting them, waiting till they were perfect Did you wanna hone them even more, wait till you deserved it I got it now, you ain't spit gun bars cause you were waiting for a permit Very responsible of you You always like to say that Americans have rights Correction, America always has Arabs in its sights America has rights, no America has kids in cages terrorized by ICE I'm telling you and asking you, man to man Go talk about American rights to the tombstone of Sandra Bland You're a new husband, some day a prospective father Talk about American rights to the grandkids and kids of Eric Garner Diz, I agree that in many ways, Clinton would've been a evil killer But the communities I work with, are truly getting hurt Diz And a lot of it is because that motherfucker Stephen Miller Who is it? Oh golly shit man, Stephen Miller, the opponent by the guy you voted for And I know you changed your mind, but you can't change your time It's kinda weird right now, it fucks me up a little bit I know this ain't your typical wordplay, work day But it's a little disturbing you ain't know who Stephen Miller is, but you probably know like Piccolo's birthday See, I have changed, Diz It's proof, you don't agree cause you don't believe in evolution No, like you don't actually believe in evolution Like the theory of Charles Darwin The theory of evolution You don't believe in evolution, it's the reason that we're human But I do remember you have a thing for Schrödinger's cat Well the man Schrödinger that, conceived it and concluded it that even he fucking believed in evolution You know what rhymes with Schrödinger too? He was inspired by Einstein, socialist Jew Diz, what you gonna do if battle rap vanishes Alright, what you gonna do Where would you shift in your life I mean Real Deal is a educator Ooops was a legislator Fuck, what are you? {Dizaster whispers: "a detonator"} A son of privilege riding on a golden escalator with the social skills of a 2nd grader? My man, you need to find something, to shift your life I still got music, just started again, [?] Let me give you some advice Find a mission that might not pay a lot but make you feel like you got skin in the fight Hell, keep talkin' about Socialism, maybe you could join our organization DSA Come with us on this journey Cause in 2021, I know you [?] about this, the president is Bernie [Round 3: Dizaster] Alright man that was cool...Jesus Christ I don't mean no offense by that by the way See cracking jokes and laughing is fine But let's get back to the stats and the actual signs Your total impact on battle rap is 12,000,000 views you have racked up online In comparison I have 13,000,000 on one battle so technically one match up of mine Has more views on it than all your battles combined Yeah, you have the battle in mind, but it's the cancerous kind The type that thinks, "Hmm. All these battlers are doin' is just passin' their time But if they can't use this to boost their music then that can't get no shine." 'Til someone shows him a picture of Tsu Surf and he takes off his glasses, "Hmmm. I can't really see that. I'm actually blind." And this is how he was actin' when he was back in his prime I want you guys to try to imagine what he would've acted like if he actually got signed "I'm Soul Khan and all you MC's are peasants!" Let that sink in for a second And tell me this dude here is on my level When he hasn't even shown y'all enough love or wrote enough history And I still say this to little bro respectfully A two year stretch is like Bill Bellemy, that's a joke of a legacy So whether he, do or don't have any respect for me In the end, I'm still considered the legend on every top ten you see If you even say the word "battle rap" my resume alone will force you to mention me I'm memorable because of my work ethic, of course they remember me The respect we have for you is only present because we as a culture selfishly kept you alive in our collective memories Because besides that you haven't done anything You're prevalent cause we make your relevant and that's a closed case and a no brainer like JF Kennedy I'll bet you a dead president half of these people forgot your name But for our sake, for our sake {Soul Khan starts laughing} Oh don't laugh, cause yeah, it's okay They probably forgot your name But we still gotta give you a little star on battle rap's Walk Of Fame Just not on Hollywood Boulevard, yours would be laid down on Memory Lane And that's the realest shit anybody's ever wrote about you Cause you wanna be this voice for the people but your body of work don't add up to what you socially amount to I got my crown jewels cause I show and prove strictly off ground moves While you got a status quo that exists merely cause the people around you Subjectively gave it it's value Don't you get it? Without us, you don't have you And without me, they don't have views So without this battle the fans lose And if you ever question who I am to this scene, I'm everything bitch, THAT'S WHO! And you the little jokey jokey kid, who only poses a risk (wrist) when he poses like this Uh oh, I think he's forming a flip He's about to channel the inner Charron from his dick He makes jokes about himself cause that's his only defense But what kind of lack of testosterone is this? He's gon' become some kind of leftist Hollywood director I can see it now, workin' on his own little script Relaunching new episodes: Soul Khan Presents: Zena The Warrior Prince This guy went from a full blown chauvinist to an emotional bitch Look I understand that you regret being so homophobic but you need to get over it quick Don't be like Jussie Smollett now and beat yourself up over this shit Because of course you're not homophobic bro, we know that Cause you're really gay in secret Last time you passed out at a frat house they drew a dick on your forehead while you were sleepin' And the first thing you said when you woke up and peeped it Was..."I'ma keep it." So that's all you had? The little homophobic kiss me angle you was gonna come back with? [Soul Khan] The offer still stands [Dizaster] To cover up the fact that you were consistently callin' people "homo" as one of your habits You wanna know something bro? You know what's really gay? When they asked you if you had love for battle rap still and you answered back with, "I don't know if I've ever had it." Soul Khan in our world, that's the definition of a {beep} Of course he gets no passes If he recycles he should be judged like all the MC's He said, "Oh, I don't know if I can catch up on these battles to know if I'm reusing a bar or a scheme." But that's the point dummy, it's pretty much a logical thing You wouldn't have to watch 1,000,000 battles in a row if you actively cared enough to still be a part of the scene But, you wouldn't have to catch up if you were here That's what makes you a foreigner but what does all of this mean? It means you failed as a battle rapper and you failed to go mainstream So now you this lost underground backpacker that's caught in-between Wanting to make bars or do a song where you sing So Soul Khan you'll always be a man of many Willy Wonka hats but you'll never be the boss of one thing So tell me, what you planning to do with all this you self deprecating Jew apologist? I know you're reformed now but to me you're every "isist" and "ologist" there probably is You made a living off of calling people "fruit balls" You're basically a RuPaul-ogist All these things make it all too obvious Khan is a true Communist But this is Americana, and what Khan insists on don't make no kinda sense We on some reconnaissance You know who my gang is Khan, don't make me Genghis Khan your shit Death by a thousand cuts, I'll leave him with all kinds of body slits When the Katina leaves cuts in him deep as the Mariana Trench I'm fast as Mayweather, you may die now quick Pull up on him, Maradona kick I'll dangle you from a cedar tree like a pinata then bat you with a fuckin' hockey stick And keep beatin' your body with it until the candy (w)rapper that's inside of you eventually falls out of it I fucking {beep beep beep} take a fuckin' time bomb and shove it down your esophagus Have you coughing up blobs of phosphorus Since you're a narcissist you shouldn't have a problem when someone makes you swallow your own confidence I'll curb stomp this Erin Brockovitch lookin' nerd Off of his high horse then drag him by force from his nerdy ass little work offices I'll put him in a dirt plot, put the Earth on top of it I could put him in a box or a bag but this what he gon' earn (urn) off of this A fermented body in a reserved spot in a fully furbished German Sarcophagus This is the most violent Socialist inside your metropolis He wants to strike over politics Ready to riot outside the White House in Washington Getting into a dildo fight with Milo Yiannopoulos He said if it wasn't for the music he might've destroyed all of us Pssst, well let's look at the ergonomics and purpose of this worthless comment Your verses has always been full of meaningless words So no one gives a fuck about your new learning process We never got to see the work in progress I'm a murderous terminologist A wordsmith and a workaholic You a dirty Socialist that never earned shit but feel like you deserve a profit Capital One, tell me what's in your wallet You said you can't focus on battle rap cause music is your obligation Well let's contemplate on Khan's template Let's spend a moment in a world of Khan's creations His ancestors used to get fucked up in Concentration Camps But he stays with a camp that fucks up his concentration If you ask me, I think Khan is in his own constellation His concept is so convoluted and drawn far outta context That for me it's confirmation, if they ever held a nomination, who had the best content That Khan verse (converse) wouldn't even be in the conversation Who does name flips like that? How many concerts has Khan conducted? How many projects has he conjured up or Khan constructed? I'll tell y'all...nothing! So of course he gonna talk about my accomplishments I fucked up a lot of times, those were the hands I was dealt But you aspire to battle people like Aspire So naturally you'll never understand how battling someone like Canibus or Cassidy felt Because you packed up and left, only to return like Kim Kardashian and make an ass out yourself Cause what you say? "I'm done. There's no battlers left." But a real battle rapper doesn't beg for no hand outs or never asks for no help I'm the man because I became a man that can stand by himself And you here cause you battling Dizaster, that's it, you don't have nothing else I'm on a different level, I single handedly branded myself I shouldn't even have to meddle (metal) with these little pussies like a chastity belt I'm glad I came down to Oakland to give him this ass whippin' He just panders to the crowd, acts like he cares about black culture He just usin' black culture to push him, he drops one line about civil rights and the whole crowd overlooks him But if you really believe the whites were gentrifying your city you would've moved yourself the fuck outta Brooklyn You are literally an invader on a black man's turf And you're Jewish which makes it that much worse Literally, you're the problem you're trying to take out And it's the same way back in the day, the GrindTime situation played out You say, "R.I.P. PH", but when he alive you did him like a two faced snake Lucky for you back then the little dirt never came out But I got the info and then some How he was helping you get some battles back when you couldn't even get your shit done He was giving you views, helping you build them back up when you couldn't get none He even gave you Cortez, that was your biggest name back then He matched you against him And then as soon as the opportunity to battle on URL comes You left him hanging on his next event, you bailed out and you ditched him A straight sucker from the Maze Runner, I wanna see you climb your way outta this one Man, ain't no safe house or escape routes, I'm pulling out the big guns, the big ones The type to make Elizabeth Warren and Adam Schiff run AK's with the twin drums I call 'em "Soul Crushers" [?] scope on top Your dome gettin' popped I put Soul in a box like Ghostbusters Y'all remember Ghostbusters? Dan Aykroyd, Bill Murray, when they trapped Slimmer in that little box in the beginnin'? He's like, "No. I prefer the Ghostbusters version where they casted the women." Of course Soul Khan And I like women, I love women a lot But what type of women are you talking about? The ones that take photos for King Of The Dot? Whoa, it looks like we're going straight to the source Oh well, I guess Soul Khan is only here now because he's going through a really rough divorce And it's funny because, he come in here like he has this master plan Oh, but y'all don't understand this fam' That no matter how you slice it, we lookin' at a queenless person, this is half a man He's a- half of the king he used to be, he has half of his throne Half of his belongings and only half of what he owns So you can talk about my marriage, I'm happily married, I don't have a problem letting that shit be known I'd rather be that than this fuckin' depressed little fuckin' bachelor that doesn't have a home Behind this fuckin' feminist curtain there's a man that's sad and alone He wanted to make all the women in the world happy but he couldn't even make his own woman happy at home And she gone now Ain't no tellin' what ya ex-bitch might do He said he wants to be a black man for the activist He just mad his white ass found out his wife does too But hold on to hope Soul Khan your dreams might come true If she really your Soul mate Then wait nine years and maybe she'll make a comeback just like you And he thought I was gonna have 6,000,000 Jew jokes like I was gonna talk about Hitler When he's wasted ten years of his life with a photographer chick and he still doesn't get the picture Or maybe he does, and the rest is just numb Cause the relationship dipped into a dark room and eventually developed into a negative one Rumor is, after you got married, you stopped battling cause she didn't let you Which is ironic cause your timing of coming back is soon as she left you You need to face the music, she left you naked and made you look stupid But hey, in a way she was perfect for you cause she ended up walking away from the ring the same way that you did That shit is oh so cold She walked in and she told you go I don't know man, it sounds like she signed a record deal or something cause that chick really sold her Soul Maybe it's because you're always going on about Trump Trump this, Trump that Trump he did this Republican that Government that, government this Always up in somebody's mix To the point he left no attention to the special someone he's with What part of this doesn't he get? Your wife left you because of this shit Probably had enough of you running your lip Then she's probably out there right now aggressively suckin' some Republican's dick And that's just the hypothetical, here's where we cause the most damage I'm really sorry about this ammo cause this shit gon' get volcanic Cause it's ahh kinda ahh, I kinda heard before she wanted to be with you she wanted to be with Organik Oh man, and that's the bro Travis When he asked you for this battle, he was like, "Bro have it." Same way he answered you when you asked about her He was like, "Bro have it." Oh man, oh fuckin' dammit I don't even like getting this personal, these are your tactics You the one that brought up QP's baby mama His son, his child support and his taxes You the fuckin' one that brought up Sandusky versus Rone cause you felt like it would be so savage You the one that brought up Real Deal's son in not one, but multiple matches So spare me this victim bullshit, cause your karma here is solely from the role that you practice Now onto our parents You know how mad I get when people talk about my parents Oh man Oh man Now, what about our parents bro? Huh? What about our parents? My mom....is a math teacher And your mom is a librarian [Soul Khan] Clerk [Dizaster] Librarian clerk But why are we comparing them? Because women teachers? They queens, they deserve all the praise Minimum wage they deserve all the raise They the most underappreciated in a way Then comes your mom Sitting behind a desk, stamping books, twiddling her thumbs all day A library clerk, that's why her son came out into books like a nerd That's where the mother/son similarities occur Cause my mother is a math teacher...and I came out to be a Math teacher just like her Now hold on Let me talk about my dad since everybody wants to talk about him My father's dad passed away when my dad was only 19 Alright? His name was Bachir just like me He had three younger brothers, and a little sister So now forced to raise them on his own, he had no chance but to look for a bigger picture In 1976, my pops saved up and bought his first car Had it on top of the hill, just parked on it, and that's when the civil war got started A dude named Michel Aoun and the Christian Armed Forces dropped a bomb on it Now when I say "Christian", y'all assume that I'm Muslim, right? But I'm Druze, I'm not Muslim But I loved them, they my brothers But back then, we was in a holy land grab over religion A world driven by sectarianism You wouldn't the meaning of a fucked up system The people where I'm from will die to live where you live in To eat the food that you eat to sip the water you drink And that's the reason you saw me protesting But since you a spoiled little American brat I'ma explain America to you through my eyes to teach you this lesson Now let's go back to the 70's where I left you in that last scene Where Michel Aoun blew up my father's car in front of our house in Baakleen Now this is where he knew he had to leave if he was to expand the family tree But life there was lookin' hopeless So the only place that could've gave us this life was the Land Of The Free This is why I love America Because my dad came here to build a path just for me And after that, he went bankrupt and we moved permanently Those next eight years would make me everything that I am In the street, playing soccer, bare feet, kickin' the can In the fuckin' mud 'til the sun came down, shit that really turned a kid to a man But that was when you were in Woodland Hills with this little Gameboy in ya hand So you wouldn't really understand would you? Yeah, cause all we had was to be able to go out and play But as Lebanese kids we were taught to be appreciative that in a way Even though all we had was cold showers most of the time and four hours of electricity during the day I lived through this shit And through the rest of my settlement, my country would be going through this development Now listen, you remember how I said the dude that blew up my dad's car in the first segment? Okay, this is why the whole thing is relevant This is the reason I said the shit Cause that same person, 30 years later has now been elected as our president We're talking about somebody who's a political war criminal who executed thousands by his hand He's killed everything I love and that's the reason I wave this flag You hate the president of America because I understand His policies make you mad He's a goof, I know, the Tweets make you sad But guess what I hate my president because he fuckin' broke up half my nation and damn near took away my dad And listen, this is real shit They wanna start a holy war with Muslims, Druze and Christians But I will never go back to the ways that are old tradition I would rather go over there and die with them then fight with them Those are my brothers those are my sisters I look at them like they my children Now listen, I understand there's inequality here towards blacks in this system That has nothing to do with him I don't care how he sees the views if they've never been used against him So for what it's worth, you right, I'm not Muslim I am Druze, alright? Do you know what that means? That means we are under Walid Jumblatt, we are Socialist by birth That means, I can tell you firsthand that we're supposed to be the most peaceful people on Earth I mean, we're supposed to be peaceful at birth But if you push us we can be some of the most fuckin' violent people on Earth And the point being, is that you're a fuckin' wanna-be Socialist You don't know what you're screwing with Socialism is in my fucking bloodline and I want nothing to do with it Because I know first hand bro Trust me, I've lived under this Socialist government shit I'll tell you first hand that nothing gets fixed The garbage doesn't even get picked up, no one gives a fuck about shit But you wouldn't understand because you an inexperienced, uncultured son of a bitch This ain't about the joke you living or the votes you gettin' in the real world people carry guns then die over Socialism You want us to live in this global prison Where we take orders from these fuckin' old tradition senior citizens That are four times older than him So the main point, you ain't never been through nothing like this And go back to what we were saying on our parents Alright? This is what it means to be a Lebanese-American It's the journey it's where we came from and where our parents been So since you think you gon' talk about my parents I'ma use my own parents to embarrass him Back to when we was talkin' about your mom being a librarian But let's go to your dad now You heard my dad's story, oh you ready You heard my pop's story, his struggle was hard He came here and turned an emotional scar and made himself to a star And I'm following in his footsteps Which proves your pops is always a reflection of who you are But what about your dad? [Soul Khan] He was a piece of shit [Dizaster] Well he was a lawyer, and that could be respected But then what happened? He lost his bar And became an unemployed fucking loser taking business calls from his car Wait a minute, that's not all He was a musician like you, he wanted to top the charts He thought it'd go far Hibbity har har har And just like you, I doubt you'll make a career out of this ever Since you're admitting he's a shitty role model, then let me spend the rest of this to teach you how to do better Your pops at 19 got a deal with Capitol Records Compared to what happened to my dad at 19 that's substantially better Like way better But then what happened? He got dropped before he could put out any records And he was being managed by Phil Spector! Like- that's The Beatles manager, like how fuckin' bad can you be Like this is where your fuckin' personalities connect accurately Because you both went to New York to become the man you could be I guess it's true what they say, the Big Apple doesn't fall far from the family tree Aw man, everything about you is what makes you such a lame ass loser I'm too advanced This like a cave man with his tools to a space man with a computer A space man with a computer- Wait a minute Fuck it, you wanna know what the fuckin' joke was about? So who guessed the riddle I was putting out? Lucy, a drug dealer with a hangover Coco, you plus me equals...human Cousins, Caesar What are these names of? Evolution, primates So to clear up the confusion This about to be rebuttaled to everything he just said about the evolution Now, first of all, on the evolutionary chart Our most common oldest ancestor on Earth would be Lucy Now Lucy, is our oldest ancestor Technically, like a human fused with an animal By battle rap standards, that would be the beginning for us; Juice vs. Supernatural Now most of our class, evolved from that Those are the ancestors that both connect us And then there's you on the evolutionary chart Outta nowhere with the gay jokes You would be...you would be homoerectus Now the anatomy of homoerectus...anatomy wise they were flat and small They were loud, they had tiny hands, they were small They had no balls and that was all They thrived during the GrindTime Era, pay attention This is gonna get crazy They thrived during the GrindTime Era Along with the emergence of a new group of hominids Those were called the Neanderthals The GrindTime white guys Predominantly white, they felt like they had it all They came into the game as giants which allowed them to stand up tall But eventually their lack of culture will allow them to succumb to a massive fall Which predicated the rise of the Cro Magnon man We're movin' along the chart The Cro Magnon man, in our standards that would be the URL rapper, the Chrome Magnum Man Now ironically enough, this the first man to use the tools And everything was cool But eventually they couldn't come up with anything new And they hit the ceiling limit of their genetic pool Then comes the final transformation into today's modern homosapiens Me Lux, Mook, Pat, Illmac, The Saurus, ICE, Goodz, Shine People that been here for generations And most of them branched way out through these changes Including me, I went through every single one of these evolutionary changes Hold wait, that's why I got it down to a mathematic perfection Cause now I'm giving you a timeline which is an accurate projection of where we had this connection And where we last left off at the last intersection Cause you had no battles left, so it threw a monkey wrench in what was then your rapid progression Which then lead you to get wiped out by natural selection Do I know about evolution? Maybe Now, this is where you learn something new here Cause evolution ain't the only thing that I can do We almost done, I need you to focus with me we're waaay past half way here, we're almost at the end We at the end, we way past half way here I'm gonna need some crowd participation, are you guys awake here? {Crowd cheers} Alright, pull out your phones right now And trust me, I got all day, I could stay here Google "Infinite Monkey" Tell me what that say here [Guy in the crowd] "A monkey hitting keys at random on a typewriter keyboard for infinite about of time will surely complete works of William Shakespeare [Dizaster] William Shakespeare Ooh, that's another picture I put out, the sixth clue They say if a infinite amount of monkeys type on an infinite amount of typewriters in an infinite amount of universes They should be able to replicate the work of Shakespeare But later on this theory would disprove itself And actually say that, for that to be possible the probability of it is the closest number to zero And this is why me and you will never be equal This is what separates us from monkeys as people Because you see, even if you took a million, trillion infinite Soul Khans in a trillion trillion universes You will never be able to truly replicate the truest purpose of this human's verses And that's why I made this To let you know that you could never reach me I became an advanced being in this and you will always be that fuckin' monkey underneath me Pussy TIME!