Change

from Lost Alone, released June 1, 2004

and I will never see the truth, this is not a matter of my youth. I do not need anybody else, bonds would put my mind into cells. and I will never know I was wrong, never listen to those truly strong. I do not fear anything that's not me, ignorance is the ultimate key. but I wouldn't want to live like this forever. but change myself? never, never! the very thought sends shivers down my spine. I'm sure everything, everything will be fine. I am the one who cries out at night, for somebody to change my very core. not sure why I live in endless fright, doomed to love only myself forevermore. I am the one who has no real friends, shallow people flocking to my banner. always trying to make easy amends, cherishing my own overbearing manner. life - always fragile. I will never change. love - always fleeting. I will never change. life - always fragile. I will never change. love - always fleeting. I will never change. but I wouldn't want to live like this forever. maybe I really was too clever. but I wouldn't want to end like that. I would die lonely and incredibly sad. I will never drag myself out of this, the shadows of my past bogging me down. feeling lost in turmoil and crisis, my face forever set in an endless frown. I have been hurt beyond mental repair, thence destined to suffer eternal damnation. no one can be there for me to care, but without I will never find salvation. lust - always empty. but I will never change. death - always tempting. but I will never change. lust - always empty. but I will never change. death - always tempting. but I will never change. everything is about control. I must never slip, nor ever fall. anything is possible for me. I must never doubt, and finally be free. and finally be free.