Good For Some Reason

To those in my grade who Think that I am gay I am heterosexual I really would have sex with y'all If you would just allow me But you're off having your sex with girls What does that say about me? Man, this is my situation, y'all For those of you who doubt me, man Start hearing this oration, y'all Yeah Square One Back where I started I'm back on the market The girls that I courted I later deserted I got a new haircut No longer retarded Talking to girls Has some adverse effects Stutter, stammer, rest in peace, man Pay your respects I have obvious troubles with the opposite sex Double X Don't believe me? Just ask my exes Get the wrong type of woman No butt and no bosom No cleaning or cooking Not even good-looking And they're always into anime for some reason Then they're cheatin' and I'm leavin' [Chorus] I turn girls gay Boys straight, yeah Man, I'll never procreate But I don't need nobody else, I'm Quite alright just by myself And I Couldn't care less 'boutcha new girl Get myself a new girl too Couldn't care less about you, girl 'cuz ever since I been better off without you Finally awake I'm taking a break Too many mistakes I'm raising the stakes I'm raising my standards I'm done with the weeaboos Done with the feminists Done with the snowflakes Talkin' bout misogyny What a fruitless dichotomy You girls are so emotional Ever heard of lobotomies? Y'all are turning to sodomy When Clinton went for women, he Sure didn't go for Rodham, he Watched the way he walked Way he dressed Way he talked Was the best Then, pretty soon, he had women under his desk They say my jokes are stale Don't like me 'cuz I'm male But they tellin' me they love me 'til it all derails Now, I'll no longer fail Now, when it rains, it hails And when it rains in hell I'll find myself a belle WOAH... Slow down, girl What the heccin' hecc do you think is going on, girl? Take a look around, girl Don't even make a sound, girl What? You seem triggered What else am I supposed to say? Talkin' 'bout how you miss me But you're already gay It's not a question of whether Or not we get together But of will you stay out of my way? "I love you, I miss you I'll hug you, I'll kiss you!" Please just stop Before I diss you Oops wait Too late Sorry, don't hate Too much on my plate, yeah I know you felt lonely 'Cuz of my busy schedule Writing love letters But my writing's barely legible I'm finally thinking sensible Actions so regrettable Anything but forgettable So many blunders Man, I'm just left to wonder "Where's I go wrong?" So I'm rapping this song Because no one will ever be on the level I'm on Policy inflexible No more datin' bisexuals What a mystery My datin' history So reprehensible Incomprehensible And anyway, I prefer my girls Two-dimensional Come to think of it Girls are pretty overrated They say Adam and Eve, man Is how we were created But heterosexuality seems pretty outdated Now that my options are slated Weighted and measured The homo endeavor Seems pretty reasonable to me Sue me But if you are a male Gimme a holler I'm not gay, but twenty dollars Is twenty dollars So you like girls now? Well I'm glad that you're proud about it But why so loud about it? Everyone knows But no You still practically shout about it But it's a joke That you don't get And everyone's laughin' about it But I mean I hope it made you feel special for a moment 'cuz now you're Just one of four You know the kind The kind who goes from guy to girl and thinks that I'll mind I'm onto bigger, better things, man I'm back on that grind I think you'll find That the single life is simply better suited for mine Girlfriends? Nah Romance? Nah School dance? Nah Rather go to France Get some steady finance Not taking no chances With females Don't send no emails Alright? [Chorus] I turn girls gay Boys straight, yeah Man, I'll never procreate But I don't need nobody else, I'm Quite alright just by myself And I Couldn't care less 'boutcha new girl Get myself a new girl soon Couldn't care less about you, girl 'cuz ever since I been better off without you [Sax Solo] Wait I swear I'm straight I been into girls since at least, like, eight Unfortunately, they don't reciprocate They don't wanna date They don't wanna mate Or fornicate Or copulate Or even just capitulate I I don't know I thought I had it all, man I'm funny and I'm tall But they're not into that I chitchat But fall flat Like hard hat I ain't some sort of diplomat Can't communicate like that RIP But for those of you Who like boys And don't plan on changing Talk to my agent We can make some arrangements What I can't do Is promise you That after this engagement You'll be straight But I assure you It's at least entertaining [Chorus] I turn girls gay Boys straight, yeah Man, I'll never procreate But I don't need nobody else, I'm Quite alright just by myself We out