as i wait...

[MALVOLIO] It all comes down to luck In this wild, wicked world But luck doesn't have infallibility For luck had the nerve To make me one who serves When it's plain to see I ought to be nobility Even the Countess treats me with superior respect I'm clearly her favorite in the house She hinted once that, should she ever marry She hopes someone like me would be her spouse So, what's the likely theory to espouse? I could be Count Malvolio, Lord of the Estate Dressed in all the finest silks And master of my fate I'd summon all my minions in a most majestic town Then once they all arrived I'd tell them "Leave me alone" Imagine Count Malvolio, married up-and-up Watching all my fortunes as they grew They'll all wish they'd been nice Once I reload the dice When I finally get my due I'd send seven servants off to fetch my uncle Toby And I'd wait there with a most impatient frown I'd fiddle with my diamond-studded wristwatch As I lounge upon a bed of fluffy down Then Toby would approach me with a curtsie I'd extend my regal hand for him to kiss But, instead of my customary courtesy I'd indubitably lecture him like this: "Now that I am married to the countess At last it is right to speak the truth You must amend your drinking and carousing And that Andrew friend of yours must go He's simply uncouth" And he'd say "Count Malvolio, please forgive my flaws I'm just a lousy liar who thinks he's above the laws If only you could teach me how to be so refined!" But I'd say "Sorry, Toby, there's no hope for your vulgar mind!" Just picture Count Malvolio Honored and adored My destiny will all be coming true They'll all wish they'd been sweet Well, they can kiss my feet When I finally get my due I knew I wasn't dreaming or getting carried away My lady truly loves me Her missive's plain as day The clues are adding up, the letter's in my name Now all I have to do is play her game! Then I'll be Count Malvolio if I play along Act surly to the servants and tell Toby that he's wrong I'll sport my yellow stockings and cross-garter every lace And I'll always wear a monumental smile on my face 'Til I am Count Malvolio, I will ace each test My fortunate unhappy puts me to My instructions are clear So the day's drawing near When I finally get my due I shall be... [ILLYRIANS] Count Malvolio [MALVOLIO] By the grace of Jove! I thank my lucky star for coming through I'll do all that she said And then when we are wed I will finally get, yes I'll finally get my due! [ILLYRIANS] You'll get your due! [MALVOLIO] My due! [ILLYRIANS] You'll get your due! Your due!